I PUT THE HOUSECAT OUTSIDE FOR TWO GODDAMN MINUTES AS A JOKE AND HE COMES RUNNING IN WITH A SNAKE IN HIS MOUTH
OH SHIT THE SNAKE IS STILL ALIVE
THE SNAKE HAS GONE INTO THE LAUNDRY ROOM AND IM ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS
SNAKE HAS BEEN RELEASED IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD IN A PANICKED, THROWING MOTION
"Fucking put me outside again, bitch. See what happens." -My Asshole Cat
straight friend: aw I don’t understand why you’re still single
me: because approximately 8% of the us population identifies under the lgbtq community where 1.1% identifies as lesbian female, 3.5% as bisexual female, 1.7% as gay male, 1.1% as bisexual male, .3% as trans, and .3% as something else, then there’s finding someone who I’m compatible with emotionally, physically, and romantically from less than 8% of the population, and may or may not live near me
a kid from my high is fucking trending on facebook because of a stupid petition to get a senior photo of him holding a cat into the yearbook…
My principal decided to join him in a photo.
The new photograph will go in the yearbook as a way to raise awareness for American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals (ASPCA) and rescue animals like Mr. Bugglesworth and Vivienne.
ARE WE NOT GOING TO DISCUSS HOW SHE FOLDED HER HIJABS TO LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF THE CHARACTER, THAT IS SUCH A LOVELY AND GREAT IDEA. OHMYGOD